Yes, We got Lost Again

So, I’m working my way through the book. The “You are a badass” book. I’m reading slowly, as to properly digest it. One of the first things that stood out for me was being positive. Find the positives every day, list ten positive things every night before bed. Have positive energy, surround yourself with positive people, not negative Nellies. So I took stock of the people around me and I had a come to Jesus moment. After some self-reflection, I realized that I’m the negative one! I bring negative energy. Lori thy name is Nellie. I’m a damn pessimist, have been my whole life. Well, it’s time for change. Henceforth and heretofore I shall be positive! 

So my BFF, who is a positive lil egg, brought her girl down to spend the weekend with us in Florida. We decide to go for a little hike at the local environmental center. It was a 1.3 mile loop. On our walk we chat about the book, and I apologize to BFF for twenty years of negative energy. She forgives me, cause she’s so positive. (except when it comes to her new car’s navigation system.)  The trail is very muddy, but if anyone complained I shouted, “Be positive! We’re in florida, it’s warm, and the sun is out! And oh yeah, I’m a badass!”

After almost an hour, we wonder why we’re still on the trail. Hm… (Mind you, this is the same cast of characters who got lost on a mountaintop in October and had to call 911.) 

I suddenly have a sense of deja vu. “Wait!” I shout. “We’ve been here already. This looks familiar.” No, they all insist, no we haven’t. They say that there’s no way we could’ve missed the exit for the trail. I quirk a semi-positive eyebrow. “I dunno bout that.”

We eventually come upon a place that I remember distinctly. “Aha!” I say. I point out how my BFF’s girl jumped over a mud puddle to the boardwalk bridge, “right there.” She says, “No way I could’ve made that leap.” (Negative!) I say, “It was quite a leap.” (Positive! The new me.) I walk along the bridge confident in my assessment of the situation. But when I turn back, I could see they still doubted me. My BFF has now gone all CSI on me, looking at the sole of her shoe and asking her girl to compare treads in the mud to see if she had, indeed, been here before. Ye of little faith. 

Finally, we come to a lake that we all recognize. Yes, we are lost on a 1.3 mile loop. Well, lost may be too harsh. But we lost our way. Positive energy evaporates, as my BFF exclaims, “If we loop around this thing again I’m gonna lose my shit!” 

But, tada! We see the sign, which I’ve shown below. I have no fuckking clue how we missed it. It’s rather large. 

So what is our lesson today kittens? Well, you already know not to travel with me, right? Now I have just reinforced that you do not want to hike with me. I feel sorry for you gals coming to Clexacon with us. Regina is already shaking in her boots when I told her we were taking her for a hike in the desert. Don’t worry G! We will get by with Wootten’s survival skills! She was a supercop, after all. 

I leave you with this final thought. Be positive! Read the book! Let’s all be badasses together.